I took a long bus ride from Jurong Point to Woodlands Int yesterday. I thought about lost loves, how they became to be and etc. I would love to elaborate about each and everyone of them that I was seeing (including those that I wasn't in any sort of exclusive relationship with) but later decided that it was too intimate a detail to share.

So anyway, I thought about the girl that was almost there. The girl whom I would hear her laugh and cry. But just not the way things should be. Its 2007 already. Amazing how time flies. She would have been almost a year old now. Dah pandai bebual perkataan yang aku takkan paham agaknye. Heck.

That night, I felt the wind in my hair (well not exactly. One can imagine can she?). For once, I felt free. I forgot all about my problems.

I seek peace in praying. I prayed for the lost loves. I mean the really lost ones. I prayed for arwah bapak, ayah, papa, budak kecik, etc etc. Read the surah Yasin. I thought I would feel better after that. But it was only momentarily. After that, it was back to square one.

She has been such a pain in the neck. Constantly asking me where I am every 30 minutes when i specifically told her where I would be. Its pissing me off!! And she invades my privacy!! I wonder if she's reading my personal diary. I better put it away. Tapi takpe lah. I came out from her. I certainly cannot raise my voice at her. I would be committing a very big sin. On top of all the other sins that I have done of course. So what do I choose to do? Keep silent, sorok dalam bilik, sembunyi kat library, solat and all that. Simply choose not to face her.